Is your baby's father pushing for abortion?

Around 50 percent of all pregnancies in the United States were unplanned. If you got pregnant by surprise too, that can sure be a shock. And if your baby's father is pushing for abortion, that can make the situation that much more difficult. What should you say to a man who is asking you to have an abortion? What should you do now? Will you still be entitled to any kind of child support if your baby's father wants you to have an abortion?

How to react

Deciding how to communicate with your partner, or your baby's father, once he has said that he would like you to get an abortion, is hard and very personal. Many women are not sure how to deal with this one, and every woman who wants to continue her pregnancy despite the baby's father wanting an abortion will have some conflicted feelings and worries about the future. My instinctual reaction to this situation is - Good riddance!

Unplanned pregnancy happens. Dads to-be who want abortions are irresponsible jerks. In reality, though, these situations are a lot more complicated than that. Going for counseling yourself is always a good idea. If you were in a stable relationship with the man who now wants you to have an abortion (and even if you weren't) you can also ask your baby's father to come to therapy with you, to work through your problems and perhaps reach some agreements.

What now?

If you want child support, that will probably involve a DNA test and possibly court action. If you don't, and are happy to parent without your baby's father, the future is more straight forward. Some men who want their partners to get an abortion come round during the pregnancy or after - if you don't want to risk sticky legal situations later on (because his family decides that they want contact with your child, for instance) it is best to consult a lawyer.