Sex is one of the most important ways of connecting to our partners. A lack of sex often causes relationship problems, or already existing problems can cause a lack of sex. When both partners are satisfied with the quality and quantity of intimate relations, everything is fine. But, if you still have a high sex drive but your partner doesn't feel like doing the deed anymore, very real problems can arise.
What can you do when your partner doesn't want sex anymore? The first step is obvious, but many couples skip it. It is, of course, to talk about what is bothering you. When your partner is no longer interested in physical relations, you are bound to feel rejected, insecure, and may wonder if there are any affairs going on.
Don't wonder in silence tell your partner that you miss having sex, and ask him or her why they don't feel like it anymore. Sometimes, the stresses of life are the reason. It's hard to keep your libido intact when there are financial worries, small kids waking up during the night, or other similar issues. Hormonal problems can also be behind a decreased or non-existent libido, particularly for women (and particularly when it comes to postpartum sex).
If, after talking about your issues, you determine that you can't solve them by yourselves, a sex therapist is a good step. These therapists often have practical tips on how to improve your sex life, in a way that will make both partners happy again. If you are not comfortable with therapy (yet), or don't have a good sex therapist near you, the internet can also offer some help.
Where your problems in the bedroom are actually caused by deeper relationship difficulties, couples counseling will be a better first step than seeing a sex therapist. Whatever you choose, though, don't neglect to talk to your partner. An open mind and the will to listen to each other are necessary to fix any problems you have.
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