Managing caregiver guilt: five tips to manage guilt so guilt serves you

The Guilt which Eats Us Away

We, as human beings are prone to feeling guilty. Namely, we live by a system, having something a fixed set of traits we consider our ideal us in our head at all times. Every time we do something that does not match this ideal us, we are bound to feel guilty. This is our way of controlling our behavior and making sure we are on the right track in life. However, this guilt can be groundless quite often.

There are many people who are taking care of someone else. This could be a sick family member, a husband or a wife with serious health problems etc. Then, many of us are prone to feeling guilty because of the negative state of affairs. We tend to be judgmental towards ourselves since we have not done anything to prevent the current problems. Yet, we should not torture ourselves this way.

The same is with sick parents. Usually, people are meant to stay at home at all times and take care of their sick parents, missing out on their own lives. For example, you may miss your child's first school performance only because you stayed at home with your own sick mother, feeling guilt strong enough to keep you locked to the house. At the same time, you feel the guilt which made you stay home and the guilt for missing out on your child's important, unique, moment in life.

This kind of guild is no way to live and you need to surpass it in a constructive and creative way. The instructions below may be all you need for this to be possible.

How To Live Life Without Guilt?

First, you need to know the exact reason behind the guilt you are feeling. You will not be able of reacting unless you know what is causing your need for reaction in the first place. Put your feelings into words and learn how to express your emotions.

Next, find the mismatch between the ideal you and the miserable you tortured by guilt. Then, establish your needs. Obviously, the status quo is not what you need. Therefore, you need to do something different. Neutralize the guilt and think about your own happiness. Learn how to satisfy your guilt and make it disappear, while, at the same time living your life the way you want it.

Finally, always remain true to the ideal you, regardless of the price. Be good towards you family and loved ones, both those you are taking care of and those you are not. Still, do not let guilt make you choose sides. Rather, turn it off by staying true to the ideal you, caring for all the people you love, putting those in need first, but not neglecting those who deserve your care nevertheless.