Not a People Person?
Many of us have troubles coping withother people and getting in contact with them. This involvesinability to lead conversations, let alone start them, buildrelationships and be open to other people. These factors can make aperson's life miserable since, after all, we are all sociable beingswho need other people's presence in order to function and staymentally healthy, through socializing and conversation.
Low self-esteem is one of the mainobstacles when it comes to socializing, meeting new people andleading conversations, strengthening the bonds between you and otherindividuals. People who lack self-esteem and self-confidence, are often frightened of leading a socially rich life, staying awayfrom almost all people surrounding them. This, of course, is bad and theyshould give their best to overcome their fears and surpass theircounter-productive shyness by boosting self-confidence.
Lack of self-confidence stems directlyfrom our negative self-image. Namely, some of us are not satisfiedwith certain aspects of our own personality. Therefore, we transferthese insecurities and self-doubts onto our external image andbehavior.
If we are to look for reasonsbehind this problem, quite often it is rooted in our childhood and inthe defeating words of someone we had trusted, like our parents orfriends. Later in life, the insecurities we have developed inchildhood, come back to haunt us, many times without us being awareof it at all.
Luckily, once you manage to pinpointthe main cause of your personality issues, you may start dealing withthem, boosting your confidence.
As it was mentioned above, you need tofind an emotion, external behavioral factor or any other factor of your behaviorthat is causing you to feel the lack of confidence. Then you should motivate yourself towardsadvancement through replacing the negative thoughts and attitudes with the positive ones.
Whenever you realize that you are being hard on yourself, being toojudgmental or negative, stop acting like that and motivate yourself towards progress. Forexample, when you are meeting a new person, do not think that thisindividual is not interested in you, or that he/she sees your flawsor any of your non-existing drawbacks. Rather, know that the otherperson is happy to get introduced to you and do your best to presentyourself in the best possible light. If you think that you are boringand that the person meeting you may think the same, identify “boring”in your head and act the opposite way.
By creating the ideal of an interestingperson you desire to be, you can implement it through your behavior. Therefore, be a positive,attractive person that has no problems making new acquaintances or friendships.