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Not a People Person?

Many of us have troubles coping with other people and getting in contact with them. This involves inability to lead conversations, let alone start them, build relationships and be open to other people. These factors can make a person's life miserable since, after all, we are all sociable beings who need other people's presence in order to function and stay mentally healthy, through socializing and conversation.

Low self-esteem is one of the main obstacles when it comes to socializing, meeting new people and leading conversations, strengthening the bonds between you and other individuals. People who lack self-esteem and self-confidence, are often frightened of leading a socially rich life, staying away from almost all people surrounding them. This, of course, is bad and they should give their best to overcome their fears and surpass their counter-productive shyness by boosting self-confidence.

The Problem

Lack of self-confidence stems directly from our negative self-image. Namely, some of us are not satisfied with certain aspects of our own personality. Therefore, we transfer these insecurities and self-doubts onto our external image andbehavior.

If we are to look for reasons behind this problem, quite often it is rooted in our childhood and in the defeating words of someone we had trusted, like our parents or friends. Later in life, the insecurities we have developed in childhood, come back to haunt us, many times without us being aware of it at all.

Luckily, once you manage to pinpoint the main cause of your personality issues, you may start dealing with them, boosting your confidence.

The Treatment

As it was mentioned above, you need to find an emotion, external behavioral factor or any other factor of your behavior that is causing you to feel the lack of confidence. Then you should motivate yourself towards advancement through replacing the negative thoughts and attitudes with the positive ones.

Whenever you realize that you are being hard on yourself, being too judgmental or negative, stop acting like that and motivate yourself towards progress. For example, when you are meeting a new person, do not think that this individual is not interested in you, or that he/she sees your flaws or any of your non-existing drawbacks. Rather, know that the other person is happy to get introduced to you and do your best to present yourself in the best possible light. If you think that you are boring and that the person meeting you may think the same, identify “boring” in your head and act the opposite way.

By creating the ideal of an interesting person you desire to be, you can implement it through your behavior. Therefore, be a positive, attractive person that has no problems making new acquaintances or friendships.

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